treatment approach

COGnitive behavioral therapy & transactional analysis

When we’re struggling, it can feel like we keep getting stuck in the same patterns — in our thoughts, in our relationships, or in how we see ourselves. My goal in therapy is to help you notice these patterns, understand where they come from, and find new ways to respond that feel more balanced and authentic to you.

Two of the main approaches I use are Transactional Analysis (TA) and Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT).

Transactional Analysis (TA)

Transactional Analysis (TA) is a way of looking at how we relate to ourselves and others. It’s based on the idea that we all carry different “parts” inside us — the Parent, the Adult, and the Child. These parts show up in our thoughts, emotions, and behaviors.

Sometimes, old patterns from childhood can get in the way of how we want to live today. TA helps us:

  • Understand the “why” behind repeated conflicts or stuck points in relationships.

  • Notice when we’re reacting from old survival strategies (like fear of rejection or trying to please).

  • Learn to step into the “Adult” part of ourselves, which allows us to respond with clarity, calm, and confidence.

  • Break free from unhelpful patterns (“games”) so we can feel more connected and empowered.

cognitive behavioral therapy (cbt)

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) focuses on the link between our thoughts, feelings, and actions. It gives you practical tools to:

  • Spot negative thought patterns (like “I’m not good enough” or “They must be mad at me”).

  • Challenge and reframe those thoughts so they feel less overwhelming.

  • Practice healthier ways of coping with stress, anxiety, or self-doubt.

how they work together

What I love about combining TA and CBT is that you get both the big picture and the tools.

  • TA helps you see where the pattern comes from and why it feels so strong.

  • CBT gives you day-to-day skills to shift your thinking and behavior in the moment.

For example: let’s say you often find yourself getting upset when your partner doesn’t immediately agree with you during a disagreement. With TA, we might explore how part of you (your “Child” state) feels unheard or dismissed, echoing earlier experiences of not having your needs acknowledged. With CBT, we’d practice identifying and challenging the thought (“They never listen to me, so I must not matter”) and replacing it with a more balanced perspective (“They may have a different opinion, but that doesn’t mean my voice isn’t valued”). Over time, this allows you to stay grounded in your Adult state — able to listen, express yourself clearly, and feel secure even in conflict.

why this matters

My goal is to help you feel both understood and equipped. Understanding yourself more deeply is powerful, but it’s just as important to have strategies you can use right away in your everyday life. Together, TA and CBT create space for insight, healing, and lasting change — so you can feel more grounded in who you are and more at ease in your relationships.

Substance Abuse

A substance use disorder is more than a physical dependence on drugs or alcohol. Even after detox, when your body is no longer dependent, you’re at high risk for relapse. Certain psychological and social factors can be powerful triggers that lead to relapse:

  • Stress, especially sudden life stresses

  • Cues in the environment, like visiting a neighborhood

  • Social networks, like spending time with friends who continue to use

These things can create a strong ongoing urge to use again. Counseling helps you escape cravings and learn to manage what life throws at you without drugs or alcohol. Chemical Dependency is often linked to mental illness. In therapy we will use motivational interviewing to identify your treatment goals (harm reduction or abstinence based) as well as cognitive behavioral therapy to address thoughts of use. We will treat underlying mental health factors in conjunction with addressing your substance use concerns to help you develop healthy habits and coping skills that will contribute to your mental wellness.

Narcissistic Abuse

Narcissists are the masters of manipulation and disguise. If you are in a relationship with a narcissist or have encountered one in your lifetime, chances are you have experienced or witnessed some of their toxic behavior. Narcissistic abuse can be subtle, often worsens over time, and frequently follows a cycle of idealization, devaluation, and rejection. The abuse may be emotional, psychological, financial, sexual, or physical.

Narcissistic abuse has both short and long-term effects on the survivor no matter how long or short the involvement. While surviving the relationship, clients often find their self-worth and sense of self has been harmed as well as their other relationships and support systems. Boundaries can be an inconceivable concept as we have been convinced we would be rejected or punished for setting them.

In therapy we will rediscover and strengthen our voice as a tool to empower ourselves authentically. We will learn to set boundaries, maintain expectations, communicate assertively, as well identify the worth that lies within by exploring core values that shape our beliefs and behaviors.

An immigrant’s journey

“As a first generation American from an immigrant family, I understand the complexities of navigating multiple cultures in a Western society. It is my passion to help multicultural populations understand how they can navigate social, systemic, and institutional challenges using their unique strengths and cultivated values to discover a life and identity that feels authentic to themselves.”

-Shaida Vafaei, Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor, MA, LPCC

Meanings are not determined by situations, but we determine ourselves by the meanings we give to situations.

— Alfred Alder